(This is a second reflection on the topic of stumbling into the Reign of God.)
Two years ago, with the help of Sister Elizabeth, the county housing authority, and a number of generous people, Carol — the mentally ill homeless woman about whom I have written before — finally moved into her own apartment. One day shortly before Christmas we drove her to sign forms and take care of assorted bits of red tape. The real estate agent is a compassionate woman who treated Carol with the same courtesy that she would have shown a millionaire. She took obvious delight in handing over to her the key to the apartment.
Stopping for lunch
After leaving the real estate office, we stopped for lunch at a fast-food restaurant. Carol was too excited to sit still and eat. She half-danced among the tables, raising her hands and praising Jesus for all to hear.
A woman working there asked if we were from a church group. I told her that we were Catholic Sisters, and she asked if we were from Saint Augustine parish. I replied that we do indeed attend Saint Augustine .
“I’m Lulu,” she told me. “I’m on work release.”
“Good for you!” I replied, not knowing what the proper response would be, as being on work-release meant that her place of residence at the moment was prison. (Should I have said, “Oh, I’m so sorry”? Or simply, “Oh…”? On second thought I decided that “Good for you” was appropriate after all, because she is working hard to prove herself a responsible citizen and to take her place in the community.)
“I’d like to be going to Saint Augustine’s,” she added.
“I’ll hope to see you there one day,” I said. And we agreed to pray for each other.
After lunch, Sister Elizabeth, Carol (key in hand), and I headed for Carol’s new home. In the car she was singing,
O holy night, the stars are brightly shining,
it is the night of the dear Savior’s birth.
Moving in was uncomplicated, as she had few belongings. Though devoid of furniture, the apartment was warm and clean, with a real bathroom, and a kitchen to prepare the food that she buys with food stamps.
However, while Carol is streetwise, she is not house-wise. She does not know some of the simplest things most of us take for granted. She has to be taught the necessity of putting the garbage can out at the curb on the designated day. Or that you don’t turn the thermostat up as high as it will go to warm the apartment, then turn on the air conditioning when it heats up too much — unless you want to run up a bill impossible to pay and have your electricity turned off.
Getting there in spite of ourselves
Those of us who have been more fortunate than Carol and Lulu — in our parents, in our economic situation, in our mental or physical health — are not for all that closer to the reign of God. Neither are we more worthy of the Christ who comes, just because we have never been in jail or in need of food and shelter. All is gift for each of us, including what we imagine we have merited. We have not earned the good things in our lives any more than Lulu, who is for the moment not even free to come and go as she pleases – or than Carol, who must be approved for SSI if she is to stay in her new lodging.
This is how the British poet U. A. Fanthorpe describes the events surrounding Jesus’ birth:
… a few farm workers and three
Members of an obscure Persian sect
Walked haphazard by starlight straight
Into the kingdom of heaven.“BC:AD,” Christmas Poems
(Enitharmon Press, 2003)
Are we not walking haphazard into the kingdom of heaven along with Carol, Lulu, shepherds, Magi, and the kind real estate agent? Or, to borrow the words of Paul Simon, are we not all more or less “bouncing into Graceland”? There is no AAA TripTik to show us ahead of time each step of the journey, and most of us do meander, sometimes on track and sometimes off.
If we are really paying attention, we will be struck with wonder at finding ourselves there in spite of ourselves.
We may be walking beneath a starlight that seems no different from yesterday’s light, in a world where war still rages, where the hand of oppression lies heavy on the poor, and where earthquakes and hurricanes and mental illness leave ordinary people homeless. What has changed, we say? The grip of evil is still unbearably strong.
Nevertheless, through all the sorrows and joys and anxieties and tedium of our lives, we are bouncing into graceland. Held by a hand stronger than sorrow and evil, we stumble into the kingdom of God.
And unlike the shepherds and the three wise men, we know how the story ends.
“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”
(Matthew 5:3)